Existing as a queer person means leading a double life like some spy in a movie in that if that part of you becomes public knowledge every single thing is at risk. It also means keeping your partner a secret if their gender expression or identity will go against cisheteronormativity. Constantly switching the pronouns they use while referring to them or settling for gender-neutral pronouns instead. It means constant discourse on your existence and the factors that could have led to your queerness both online and offline.

Some of the questions I asked the people I spoke with involve describing…


Dear diary

Today is the 17th of September, 2010 and I’m finally in secondary school. I would be attending one of the most prestigious all-boys schools in Nigeria and I’m so excited, I may not know what this phase of my life holds for me but I know that I’m ready to face it. At school today I was placed in JSS 1B and I had a lot of time to make friends even though my shy self could only make one. So I guess have a new friend.

Dear diary

Today is the 15th of January, 2011 and I…


And I Couldn’t be Happier

I’ve felt alone all my life, even though I grew up with half a football team. Being neurodivergent meant I was always the odd one out, always the last one to get picked during games, always the weird one no one understood. Add being gay to that and I may as well have left home to live in a cave all by myself.

The internet is many things; for me, it is home, it is where I found mi familia. Through the years, social media brought so many beautiful people to me just when I needed them.

In 2020, it…


Hi! I just found out I’m a Cupiosexual Aroflux Polyamorous Lesbian 😁😁😁. I’m so excited!!! Can you tell?

Sometime during the first lockdown, I was reading The Gay BCs of LGBT by Ash Hardell and I realised I was somewhere on the Asexual spectrum. I went through the micro labels and none of them fit, so I stuck with Asexual even though it didn’t feel right.

Today, I was minding my business and scrolling through Tiktok when I stumbled upon a post by a person who is doing a sort of show and tell on LGBTQ+ identities and their flags…


I’m polyamorous, and when I tell people that, they assume that I’m an insatiable cheat who wants to hoe without consequences. As an Asexual who is either sex-indifferent or sex-repulsed most of the time, I can easily debunk the last part of that claim. It doesn’t make it easier to get people to realise that I can love them and other people without loving them any less. Or to understand that being able to love multiple people simultaneously doesn’t mean that I don’t take my relationship with them seriously.

I get that it’s not an easy thing to understand seeing…


Two years ago, when I was just coming to terms with my sexuality, someone dmed me asked if I was bi and I said yes. Then they asked me if I had had sex with a woman. I said no. I already knew where this was going and I was anxious. I didn’t want to feel like I had to prove my sexuality to anyone. Then they asked me how I could be sure. When that person asked if I was sure, all my doubts resurfaced and I started questioning myself again. …


Queer people are deprived of lots of things due to their sexuality or gender identity, one of which is why their right to religion, spirituality or access to their creator. Queer people are told that they are an abomination to God and can’t be close or build a relationship with God while they are still queer or identify as queer.

“As queer people, the first thing that is taken away from us is our spirituality” — Billy Potter

Nonetheless, queer people have been able to reconcile their religion and their sexuality.

I spoke with three queer people about their reaction…


Abike
You dance like the wind
On a hot summer day
Sporadic yet soft

Abike
My love for you is layered
Like a Russian doll
You are implanted in my core

Abike
They say my love for you is wrong
They threaten prayers and jail time
But nothing has ever been more right

Abike
I want to hold you without fear
I want to love you loudly
Scream your name from the rooftops

Abike
I want to die with you
But most importantly
I want to live for you


Growing up, I was weird and lonely and I thought I was alone.

I grew up in a lower-class family so I did not have access to the internet or cable TV until I was a teenager. This meant that the only representation of people like me was me. I grew up feeling like an outcast, contorting myself into different shapes to fit in boxes I felt were the right way to be.

The internet (read Twitter) changed that. …


If I had to do it all again, I’d do all the same things, but faster.

I want to tell you about the day I met the love of my life, the person I cherish most in the world (after my niblings of course).

It was an ordinary day, I had to go to school to fill some forms that I really could have just filled online. But this is Nigeria, so they had to be filled physically. …

Emma Nwosisi

Student of law, writer. linktr.ee/emmanwosisi

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